The roads were empty, with only the sound of engines able to be heard from some distance away. The tall trees, casting shadows below, stood in the midst of the wind. Its leaves rustling in the calm breeze, while it seemed to be swaying to some sort of rhythm. There were not many lights left, but enough to illuminate the building which stood afar. Stars were out in the sky tonight. And I, stared into the open sky. The wind fast catching the side of my face, as time wore on. Into the night, once again.

It's late, but still I don't feel like sleeping at all. Perhaps it's due to the fact that I slept for 3 hours in the late afternoon. Perhaps it's just the atmosphere of the night which is keeping me up. Perhaps, it's just me.

Tonight is one of those nights when I'm in a mood even I can't explain. It's neither emo, nor happy. It neither totally hurts my heart, or makes me smile. I don't know what type of mood you can call this. But I know that being emo is no good, so i've chosen to counter this mood by trying to talk to people, by reading blogs, by doing math and physics and by furiously packing my room until every single worksheet has been sorted. And now, here I am.

Today is a day my mind keeps bring me back to memories. As I was packing my room just now, I uncovered some APCG stuff and photos. Instantly, I was brought back to that week where we had so much fun, when I was hardly failed to be made happy, when I wish it could last forever. But it can't. Nothing in this world will ever be able to bring that week back. That week, in which so many things went on. Memory, sweet memory.

Earlier in the afternoon, while I was sitting on my bed reading a book and listening to music, my mind brought me back to a different sort of memory. It wasn't a memory of events, but of people. When was the first time? I was drawn back to that first time, that last time and all the emotion in between. It is this sort of memory which made me drop my book for that while, and force myself to remember. It is also this very sort of memories which hurt, which cut deep and which make me wish that we could turn back the hands of time.

Somewhere close to the midnight hour, I was brought back to another form of memory. This form of memory were words, which held such significance for me. I don't have the time to go through them again, and again. But everything my mind flickers back to that point in time when those words were all that brought me through the day. The beauty in this is that these words are connected to people, to places and to events. It is a web of memory, which i never thought would be cut and stretched.

As dawn breaks each day, events of the past day become a memory. However much we don't wish for some days to pass, there's nothing that can stop time from moving on. We can never be stuck in a moment forever. This is how we have to learn to preserve the beautiful memories as we move on with life. This is how we have to learn to get over hurts and broken dreams as they disappear before our very eyes. This is why memories as called memories, because all we can do is remember. With joy, or with regret. And this is why I hold memories so dear, because some of them will never be able to be recreated in the exact same way, forever.

Can I ever have those times back?

Yet, I know I have to move on from here. I think I'm in a point in my life now where I must face up to my struggles, where I must wrestle with myself until I sort things out and find my answers. I'm thankful for people in my life, because I know I can't face everything alone. As in my post sometime back, I still need to sit down and sort out everything on my mind, although some things are much clearer now.

Memory.
This is how we retain beauty and pain.
This is how we move on.

I'll make it though the night.