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Wednesday, 25 July 2007
; 01:22

what's up with me? i seem to crack so much more now.

it just feels like the weight of the world. it really does.

the two paragraphs i wrote yesterday still pretty much stand.

I'm not prepared. not prepared to let myself be "cut open".

again.





Tuesday, 24 July 2007
; 00:46

sighh. i'm reallyreally tired after a long day at school. had maths CCT today and i think i did badly. much worse than what i could have done. why can't they give us more time to complete the paper? no use ranting about it now anyway.

i realise that I'm really packed this week. after school everyday, i have so much stuff exculding CCA. things like extra lessons, random MOE surveys all start popping up. and i still gotta mug for the chinese CCT on wednesday. i really need to do well! i really need better grades.

at least i can be positive because zhanglaoshi came back today! a proper chinese lesson for the first time in three months. seriously, the contrast was so stark it hit me hard. what have we been doing for the last three months? is it too late to catch up now after all that has past already? well, i'll wait and see. hopefully the results of this aren't so adverse. sigh.

haha. seems like i got so much to say today. but my mind is really whirling with thoughts of sleep and the 60 plus chengyu i just stuffed into my brain. it kills i tell you. i doubt i can explain or type anything in full now. just that issues have plauged me lately. school stuff and all. sigh. the crazy period is here, together with all sorts of elections. elections. hmm.

it glistens
the sparkling blade under rays of bright
retract ; then apply
the full force felt.
cold steel opening up the red sea,
a sea of red
three beats turn to none
emotionless, void
is the feeling of nothingness.
my heart's memories were left
at that day where
the first cut was the deepest.

misty eyes;
hope that bandaged wounds
do heal fast.
the wielded double-edged sword
pressed close with
the place i am.
the place where i am left.
the place where is left, i am.
mortal mind says,
yes.
but the other side
of me, so forewarns
that it could very well turn out
like,
very like this
deja vu.
deja vu.

there was no pre-thought of the above. it just came and i typed. maybe its too confused? maybe i'm confused in myself? i know, but is it right? could it be that the other side of the sword is facing me this time round? time for the happy ending? sigh.

oh well, "angels brought me here".

and they can take me away.


Saturday, 21 July 2007
; 12:04

we won!

yes we did. and the feeling is still so surreal. drama of history so rocks!

i can't say how happy i am. this is really the fruit of all our hard work, sacrificing our two staff training holidays for rehearsals, half our youth day for the auditions, practically the whole of this week for full-dress and final prep. now, it comes down to this. we made it. we did it.

yesterday when we left school, all of us were pretty nervous. it was a crazy rush after school as there was so little time. had our final briefing on the bus where we all got hyped up. actors put on some make-up, jonny started styling random people's hair, we just kept the atmosphere high. reaching the museum, after bringing the props from the third floor down to the basement waiting area, we waited. it was a long wait where we all gave final brieifngs. { sry if i seemed to come down too hard on any of the props guys yesterday okay? (: was just trying to settle everything! } the performance finished fast. but we all agreed after that it was the best run we ever had. had another long wait after that until 410 during which we were all so nervous. especially me. the results were announced and we won. joy.

so much thanks to all the drama of history '07 people (:

now, we gotta concentrate on our performance at the museum on National Day! come and support (:

anw, we had to go to the esplanade to watch "King Lear" after the competition. the whole group of us stayed in the library @esplanade for a while then went to eat at glutton's bay. i saw the new national day floating platform thingy for the first time up close. it looks quite cool. went up to the esplanade rooftop for a while before the performance. "King Lear" was long 4 hours in all. it ended at midnight. not exactly. rather, minutes to midnight. literally. haha. but the whole thing was pretty cool.

i shall blog more tonight. i will attempt to photoblog after my computer failed me that last time i tried to do so.

bye.



Tuesday, 17 July 2007
; 23:39

i feel so lazy today. slept for 3 hours this afternoon and now, i'm lazy to do homework. sighh. think i shall go sleep soon.

had a pretty strange day in school today. don't know really what came over me. during maths lesson, i kept telling daniel that i felt depressed. maybe what jonny said was true, that the CLE lesson on depression yesterday did more harm than help. maybe it brings about internal revelation of the heart's condition? well, i don't know. as i looked out the long glass windows of the classroom this morning, and commented about the dense clouds and the way they were blowing, there was a sense of melancholy. i know, and don't know what's causing it. events of the past stuck in my head? but to totally grasp hold of all my feelings just eludes me. sometimes, i think i don't understand myself enough. really. this morning was such a time. thankfully, it lasted only a short while before i was back to my normal self.

how did it really turn out then? i'm back to that place thinking again. one footprint is enough to jog my memory.

anw, tomorrow's the first of three consecutive days i'll be at the national museum. wednesday and thursday are full dress rehearsals. friday is the real thing. it's scary. we're up against Woodlands Ring Sec, Hougang Sec, TKGS and Assumption English School. come on guys, let's pull through. i've got desire to win and clich the top prize. do you? let's make it happen. it's just two more days of effort before the big day. everything is almost settled. we are ready.

we can, we will. it all comes down to this.

and. i'm gonna watch King Lear on friday night (: i hope it's gonna be nice. recently, i've become more selective over shakespeare. guess ms.chew's lesson helped alot. long day on friday but it'll be fun!

it rained over at my place just now. melancholy once again?

oh wells. bye.


Friday, 13 July 2007
; 22:37

hello! i'm just off two busy days in school, especially yeaterday.

Breaking News: Andrew CAN act for our drama finals. oh my goodness, that has so saved us! woohoo (:


haha. anw, had some fun in school yesterday. especially with jonny's plan to have a rehearsal after school. the problem was, he only had the plan like 2 hours before the end of school, meaning no time for anyone to reschedule things. LOL. jonny will always be jonny :p so we spent some time re-casting andrew's role and refining acting of the actors. shangxuan was initially chosen, but now andrew can act, so it's good (: managed to finish by 5 plus yesterday and then went with mooty, jarrel, andrew and junyong to bishan library to mug for chem test. didn't manage to do alot of work in the end partly because everyone was so hungry... haha.

not much to talk about today only that i think i died in chem test and i have so much more time to myself today. have to sleep early though due to NUS open tomorrow. (sry jerman that i can't go for your investiture.)(sry jianxiong that i can't go for the SMU networking thingy.) everything just seems to clash with one another.

i wanted to photoblog and post photos, but it seems like my internet is failing me (once again). sad. oh wells, shall post them another day then.



Wednesday, 11 July 2007
; 23:20

we got into the finals of drama of history! i'm really happy we managed to pull through.

after days and days of hard work, the results were finally announced today. and we made it! amidst some lousy acting and various mistakes during the auditions, we still made it. the judges liked the dynamism of our production. yay. and so, now we got to gear up for the finals next friday as well as the projected performance on national day at the museum. this makes my next two weeks expecially busy. but, oh wells, its worth it if we can pull off a first place for the competition (: but we do have to find a replacement for andrew tam though. Go Raffles!

anyway. today was swimming finals! a nice clean sweep for raffles in all divisions except 'C' Boys. for us, that was the division which mattered, but oh wells, the guys tried their best. today's atmosphere at the toa payoh swimming complex was quite okay, although i must admit that the school population was rather dead until the last few events. but everything was loud today. it's good! { oh, sorry to the people who called me while i was there and you couldn't hear me/i couldn't hear you } haha, saw natalie there as well. all the best for your drama on saturday (: at the end of the event, after the UNITE and all, countless swimmers got thrown into the pool. that included one poor kieran ram chandra who was in school uniform!! and so he got wet. and almost couldn't go home. lol. it was quite comical actually, but i still don't understand how it happened. haha XD

" and so i'm still hiding, searching for that special something. i seem to feel i have found it. but has it found me? "

sometimes, i really wonder.


Tuesday, 10 July 2007
; 22:39

yay! finally have some time to post again. but now there are so many things to blog about i don't know what to blog about now.

let's start with a quote from school today (:
"Ms. [insertnamehere] thought a cynical foul (fowl) was a duck which is disillusioned with the world."

anyways. have had so much stuff on. was rushing blogazette until 5 mins before the deadline on sunday night! and there were so many problems/errors. think "globalism", "turely", "group phot", japanese trees, etc. sry for those who don't know what i'm talking about :P i hope our blogazette turns out okay. i hope we at least get some sort of award in one of the two catergories (Learn @ theLibrary or Blogazettes). if not it would be quite wasteful. haha, i have high expectations. oh, and it was a shame not to be able to link the video. why must my computer skills always fail me? ): lol.

Fast Forward to today.

I think we had a really good lit lesson today about the value of shakespeare and things like that. Ms Chew came in to teach/conduct discussion which was a change. but through all the discussions and all, i think i got quite abit of insight on how we ca take different perceptions, the timelessness of the works and stuff like that. and it was nice to be able to really enjoy a lesson for once in a long time. as in really enjoy not fake enjoy. i hope the nice discussion will cont'd next tuesday aternoon (: im beginning to appreciate shakespeare more XD some crazy stuff followed the lesson, but oh wells.

tomorrow is swimming finals and we are going down to support. I really hope our swimmers can do a good job for our school! jiayou!

more stuff to say. i'll try to make another post later.

bye.


Sunday, 8 July 2007
; 23:42

sorry for the hiatus of this blog. i'm really really busy these few days.

i promise that i will post as soon as i can. i have so many things to update on (:


Wednesday, 4 July 2007
; 23:08

transformers rocks! it really really does (: everything is just so cool and professional, so different from the cartoon which i thought was abit imature and childish. but this one was really good. the cars and all are so pretty. and the fight scenes are done so well. well, i think i looked too deep into the plot. saw lotsa of various themes as i watched the show. lol. i must learn to watch shows for enjoyment and not for my brain to (unknowingly) analyse. but, the plot running between shia labeouf and megan fox is seriously not bad. the movie doesn't go very deep into it, but the essence is captured really well (:

and, running through trains is fun. but weird. okayy.

anyway, today at the chem lab was really funny. first, we spent millions of years trying to figure out how to use a pipette filler when there was a arrow on the rubber which pointed up. -.- we have no common sense. then shanzhi was opening the clip at the bottom of the burette which i told him to close it. he didn't know how to close it properly. chemicals all over the place was what followed. shanzhi was crazy enough to attempt to spray the chemical around while trying to close it. it's wasn't dangerous or anything ut it was just pure funny. especially if you are watching it first hand. im not suanning you shanzhi XD then, i dropped the filter funnel while trying to bring it to wash. lucikly, i managed to catch it before it broke. sigh. sounds like how i dropped the banana walnut cake out of my fridge the other day and caught it in mid-air. crap. can things stop falling? sighh.

this week is our school's youth week. it meant to be for us youth. but it seems pretty dead here in school. maybe its due to the stress levels. or the homework. hope the rest of the week can be fun. i'm looking forward to friday's mufti day. when i can wear anyhting green, black or white (: and, i'm stressed over blogazettes. okay, that was just random.




Monday, 2 July 2007
; 23:21

haha. today was fun! went to the national museum in the morning then rushed to jurong to watch transformers with rachel, nick and jerman.

sorry i haven't been updating much. seems as though the time period between each post is getting wider and wider. been really busy with so much stuff. anw, i'll prob give a mega update of today's events plus youth week soon (: but transformers really rocks.

andandand. 3K class jersey is almost confirmed! yay! our class logo rocks okayy ... :p



Sunday, 1 July 2007
; 01:04

sighh. busybusybusy. too busy to blog yesterday too. and i realised that since i always blog in the wee hours after i finish my work or during a break, the dates of the posts always are abit wrong.

anyways, yesterday was prettey much spent in school doing the same things as thursday. got there at 8am and attended prefects training for a while. we did the DISC profile again, and i was really happy we did cuz i forgot my old profile score. tsk tsk to me. this time, i'm a almost pure C. or if you rank the letters, CSID. whihc means i'm a close perfectionist! ahh! haha. i thought i would be a SCDI or a CSDI, didn't expect my D to end up so low. maybe i did it wrongly. sigh. then after the session, i had to leave already to go for the drama of history rehearsal. went to j8 to have lunch and pick up important materials and then went back to school. everyone was late. which was a bad sign. but then the rehearsals in the end were quite good. kept running through and refining stuff until 530 plus when most of them went home. some of us lingered around for a while and we had a long and random (maybe not so) talk with mrs neoh. and we were also talking among ourselves for a possible litRA-historyRA trip to somewhere. haha. that would be so fun! in the end, left school at about 7 plus and went back to j8 again to have dinner with jarrell, matthew and jun sean. home at 8 plus.

last night after going home, i decided to really rush my chinese book review. so i just typed and typed and typed but still got nothing much out. slept at 3 plus last night and got up at 12 plus pm today! eek! slept until super late. time now is 110am, sunday morning. and i have just finish rushing more of my review. i'm happy now cuz i think there should only be about 250 words left to type. yay! but i'll leave that unitl tomorrow. feeling really lazy now. really lazy after so long of work.

i'm super nervous about drama of history rehearsals on monday morning. hope everything goes well and that the immense effort we put in pays off, finally.

andandand. why are ecne people not responding to me? how to plan like that? eek! please reply okay?

haha. gonna turn in soon. my eyes are so gonna close (:


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